Again and again, we burst into flames
To be born again, with more brilliant wings.
You can call me Phoenix.
I love redwood trees and the ocean, long car rides and bright colors.
My childhood was hard & filled with case workers, staff members, diagnoses and medications.. foster care sucked, and i survived.
I’m picking up the pieces of my broken childhood and creating a beautiful mirrored glittery mosaic.
This blog is for me to share my journey, and hopefully meet others who have walked a similar path.
Some more about me:
I was really badly neglected, isolated, and abused until I was 12, when I finally got taken away by CPS. I was really, really hurt by my upbringing so I lived in group homes almost exclusively. Group homes are no joke – it’s like jail for kids, doing time for their parent’s crime. Since group homes are not an environment well suited to raising children, I’ve had a hell of a time figuring out who I am and how to act since I emancipated.
It was hard to get here, but I’m now at a good place in my life. I’ve got a loving support network, I’m finally getting the hang out this whole college thing, and I recently moved to a new town! Although I’m starting a new chapter of my life, my experience in foster care will always impact my life.
The thing is, now I’m in control. I was so angry at what had been done to me, and although my anger burned me quite a bit, I eventually learned how to turn it into something positive. I’ve taken my experience and I am using it to educate and help others. I’ve done work with California Youth Connection to advocate for policy change in my community and statewide. I’ve also had the privilege of sharing my story at several public events. This means so much to me, because there was a time when I was truly convinced I would be a statistic, a tragedy of the system. I guess there’s a part of me that never gave up hope.
If there are any former foster youth reading this right now, I want to congratulate you on making it to this point in your life. Wherever you are, whatever situation you may be in. You’re still surviving, despite what you’ve been through, and I commend you. I want you to know that it really always gets better. I know how hard to can be to trust others, and even yourself. But please don’t give up.